In 1978, when The Atlanta Journal/Constitution featured me and my small booklet in the Peopleetc. section, Tuesday, August 22, I was sure the booklet sales would take off and I would be well on my way with second time bride programs, projects, and weddings. To my chagrin, it never happened. I was thirty-six years old and in an abusive relationship. I was wasting time trying to support my reason for remaining in a relationship with an awesome intellect by day and a criminal mind by night, all the while protecting my young daughter.

My second husband was smart, educated and a savvy entrepreneur who loved his wife, but loved his Gin more. What prompted me to marry a second time? What personality test, i.e., Jung and Isabelle Briggs Myers Typological Approach to Personality, should I have taken? Were there signs? Most certainly!! Did I see them? Yes!! Did I ignore them? Yes!! Should anyone listen to me thirty-eight years later?

I don’t know but I do know that according to the US Census Bureau, most men and women marry within five years of divorce. Generally, a higher percentage of men remarry within five years than women do. In addition to the general pattern of men remarrying more than women, a higher proportion of whites remarry than blacks. The report continues to say that the length of time to remarriage after being widowed from a first marriage, was three years for men and 4.4 years for women. Most of those who were recently remarried had biological children, although not all living in the household.

How then does this information impact you? The variables in this discussion can influence any level of your decision to remarry. What I hope to do is to provide you with certain keys to unlock any veiled, secretive, or concealed wish list that could sway your decision to marry the second man of your dreams.


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